The elephant in the room.

What a crazy 3 weeks of engagement we've had!

In a matter of 21 days, we've both wrapped up our school semester, made arrangements for the wedding and I was in Vegas for 4 days. I JUST got over the cold from hell. 6 days of sneezing, coughing, the works. Now summer is in full swing and it'll be a busy one for both of us full of work, wedding planning, vacation and before we know it it'll be September again.

Tonight, I'm dealing with the reality of my life at this point in time. While it is so exciting to start figuring out the details of the big day I've been confronted with the elephant in the room. This isn't something small - it's something big I've dealt with for several years. My weight.

When I met Cameron back in 2004, I was a bit smaller than I am these days. In fact, I hate admitting it but I will.. since the beginning of our relationship I've gained 80 pounds. While I would love to blame it on everything under the sun - the biggest and main problem was my bad choices. Of course, I've made attempts to lose weight. I've had gym memberships, joined weight watchers, done research, but in the end I've always found an excuse, a new explanation for my choices and gave up. Through high school and even now in college a part of me always thought I could get away with it because I'm young and I thought the weight will come off eventually. With our recent engagement and the end of undergrad rapidly approaching, my "youth" is quickly coming to a halt. What other choices do I have at this point? Only one, get healthier. It's really time to stop being selfish because this impacts everyone around me. I want to be able to wear the dress of my choosing at our wedding. I want to be able to chase my kids around one day. I want to do things I'm making it harder to do everyday with my unhealthy lifestyle.

So as of today, May 28, 2011 - I've decided it's time to do life. Join me as I tackle my 80 pound goal. It's now or never.